Kowai
by Dr.V Productions
Summary: Riza has just given birth, but where's Roy? Post Brotherhood. Originally intended as one-shot, but is now 2 chapters. (Complete)
1. Chapter 1

**Kowai**

 **Disclaimer:** **I don't** **own anything. All content is based off of "Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood" all rights (copyrights) go to the producers. All rights reserved and used with no consent.**

 **Summary: Riza has just given birth, but where's Roy? Post Brotherhood. Oneshot.**

 ** **Chapter 1:****

Riza was tired. At one moment she felt as tired as when the gold tooth doctori had cut her neck and she had been bleeding to death on the floor. But Riza didn't care. She knew Roy. Something was wrong. She knew him so well that she knew if he felt fine, he would've refused to leave the room. He would've rushed in the first moment they announced that they had a son. But a few minutes had passed and Roy wasn't in here.

Yes. The door opened. To reveal Olivier Armstrong and her dear Grandfather. General Grumman. Grumman smiled and chuckled, "I have a beautiful Granddaughter I lived to see to be such a mature woman. Now I can't believe I have a Great-Grandson. Even if his father is egomatic and not the best man in my interests." Riza let out a weak smile. But anybody could tell she didn't mean it.

"Where's Roy?"she inquired.

A voice from the doorway answered, "Roy-boy turned tail and left the moment he was ushered out of the room, saying something about tons of work to do." This voice belonged to Madame Christmas.

Miraculously, Riza's face didn't fall completely. In fact, most women in her case would've cried many dozen times. Riza hadn't shed a tear. Riza Hawkeye was strong, and smart. She knew Roy couldn't go anywhere. She knew Roy still loved her. But she also knew that you couldn't force somethings on people. If her husband didn't want the child, then for him, Riza would consider putting the child up for adoption, or taking all the responsibility of the child on herself. Roy wouldn't have to suffer being forced into parenthood by an unplanned baby. Roy hadn't taken it badly per se, but he hadn't taken it well either. Roy had been calm. Too calm. He became distant. Sure. He came home. He worked with her. He gave her quick kiss on the cheek here and there, when she was feeling particularly horrible on a certain day, but these past 9 and a half months, he'd never done anything further. He didn't secretly take her hand and caress it, or squeeze it to reassure her. No passionate kisses. No hugging. And he definitely avoided talking about the baby. Even till now, they'd never really made a nursery. Sure, they had an extra room, but it was still filled with her guns, and his junk. Roy stopped calling her Elizabeth when they were alone. Which was why Riza didn't allow herself to feel anything over the baby but sadness yet. She didn't think of names for her son. She didn't let her face fall. Sure, there was a twinge of sadness in her eyes, but the rest of her face was stoic.

"If you don't mind, I'm going to have a talk with that boy. Coming with me, Grumman?"Madame Christmas asked. Grumman nodded and they turned to leave. "Wait. Grandpa,"Riza called. Grumman turned around, and his fast was soft, but serious. Riza almost never called him Grandpa after Roy left for the military. It had done something to her irreversable for sure. Grumman could count the times on one hand.

1\. After she came back from the Ishvalan war, broken.

2\. His coronation of becoming Fuhrer.

3\. When she and Roy told him they were engaged.

4\. Her wedding day.

5\. When she told him Roy's reaction about her pregnancy.

"Don't be so harsh on Roy. And... if you see him. Tell him I love him, and would like him to name our child,"Riza pleaded. Grumman nodded with a sigh before he and Christmas left for real this time.

"I wouldn't want to be in your shoes right now, Riza,"General Armstrong observed. Riza didn't even answer. She just kept staring at her son. His tuft of hair looked exactly like Roy. He already resembled Roy more than her by a lot.

Armstrong chuckled. "I always admired you, Riza. Even if you picked a jerk with a cocky attitude and has an ego even bigger than his mouth."

Then Armstrong stopped to study her before adding, "They're exactly like each other even though the little one is just about a hour old. They may not seem worth it at first. And they aren't. For me. But you need to hang on. Because I can tell you love both of them much, much more than I love my brother. Which isn't saying much, of course. All right. I'm done with this sappy stuff. You need rest. I can tell you're at your limit." Then General Armstrong walks back out, closing the light and door on her way so that the only thing lighting the place up was the streetlamp lights, moonlight, and the lamp on the bedside table.

 ** **VVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVV****

The next thing Riza knew, she was awakened by crying sounds. She tiredly pried open her eyelids to see a sleeping Roy next to her in the armchair before realizing where she was and why she was there. Riza glanced at the clock. 4:00 a.m. She had only been asleep for about a hour. With a grunt, Riza slowly propped herself up into a sitting up and swinging her legs off the bed, and painfully stood up, supporting herself with the bed. Riza took a step over to the crib and instantly collapsed. Damn her weak legs after 10 hours of labor and only one hour of rest.

The crash awoke Roy and he was there in an instant, supporting her and pulling her up. For the first time in a while, Roy was close enough so Riza could smell him. It wasn't a smell that could be described. It was just _Roy_. It was Roy and it had always been so comforting to her. "Why did you have to put him all the way over there?"Riza grunted as he heaved her back onto the bed before turning to grab the baby in a very manly and awkward way before dumping the fidgeting newborn in her arms.

"It was about to fall,"Roy answered, plopping back down in his armchair. Riza noted his use of it. Not "our son". Not "our child". Not even baby. Riza pulled her shirt down just enough so that the child could nurse, and Roy watched before noticing that while Riza had done all this, she had also watched him intently. Roy turned red and looked away.

With an amused smile, Riza commented, "You're my husband. I won't shoot you where it hurts most if you just look. It's not like it isn't anything you haven't seen anyways." Then they fell back into a weird silence once again.

"Wanna hold him?"Riza asked. Roy looked back at her, eyes wide, before nodding slightly. Riza handed it to him carefully as he sat on the edge of the bed. He held their son awkwardly before Riza adjusted his arms. The baby instantly nuzzled against his chest and went to sleep.

Riza looked for a spark in his eyes, something to show that he was feeling what she was suppressing so that she wouldn't be disappointed. But there was nothing. All he did was look stiff, terrified, nervous, and confused. Riza's guts felt like they had twisted themselves in a knot. Or was it her heart?

She knew very well what she had to do. If that was what she had to do to help Roy acheive his dreams, and to not force something into his life, which was her fault, that would hinder his progress to the title of Fuhrer, then she would do it. Even if it was like ripping half of her heart out and shattering it with her own hands.

 **I've tried many, many times, that I haven't published, as well as the ones I have published and taken down, to write a Roy and Riza fanfiction. I hope this is okay. Right. If that's it, I'll just go back to being embarrassed of my poor writing skills.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Kowai**

 **Disclaimer:** **I don't** **own anything. All content is based off of "Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood" all rights (copyrights) go to the producers. All rights reserved and used with no consent.**

 **Summary: Riza has just given birth, but where's Roy? Post Brotherhood. Originally intended as one-shot, but is now 2 chapters.**

 **Chapter 2:**

Everyone watched her with sad eyes as her fingers gripped the pen. Riza didn't tell Roy. There was no need to. It was obvious he didn't want it, and she'd save the trouble of making him say so, so that he wouldn't look looked up at Grumman. It was the saddest she had ever seen him, and her heart twisted at the memory of Roy sporting a face like that too. Their child already looked shockingly like Roy. Not that it mattered. Not that he'd even be their child in a few seconds anyways, if only she could just get her stubborn hand to move.

 **VVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVV**

Roy had been distracted. Everyone had been distracted with Riza gone, and especially now that there was a cute little baby to catch all the attention and be the biggest distraction ever. Roy sighed and rubbed his temples.

He had done nothing wrong. Yet Roy felt guilty. Was it wrong that Roy hadn't felt happy at all, because it was all shadowed by that huge, colossal fear? The fear that his son's childhood would be like his. Was it wrong being so scared he couldn't be happy, because he didn't have an example to follow?

Today, however his subordinates seemed to be even more distracted than usual. All of them glanced at the clock, and then their superior several times, before going back to work for a few seconds, and repeating the cycle. Finally a hour in, Roy snapped.

"What the heck is it up with you all today?! I've had it! What can you be expecting that is so important that all of you glance at the clock every few seconds?"Roy bellowed. He was on his last nerve. Somehow Riza seemed so much more distant, and with the baby, it was even worse. It was gnawing at Roy, and he had been in a horrible mood since the baby had been born the day before.

All of his subordinates' jaws fell open. They'd all assumed he'd known. They had been expecting Roy to jump out of his chair any second to stop Riza. None of them had thought that perhaps he hadn't been informed of this life changing decision, life changing not only for him and Riza, but their child as well.

In an uncharacteristically soft voice that seemed to carry a certain amount of pity, Havoc answered, "Sir... do you really not know? Did Riza really not tell you that she's going to sign adoption papers?"

Roy's eyes unfocused, his heart beat like crazy, but the world around him spun to a stop. It was like he was underwater, everything pressing down on him. Riza, Riza who had wanted a child so much even though she knew Roy didn't have a plan for one until after he became Fuhrer, until she was too old to bear a child. Riza who had gotten the child that although she had not wished aloud for, Roy knew very well she longed for in her heart. His chest heart, and his throat seared, as if something was pressing down on his chest and not allowing him to inhale oxygen.

Within a second of Havoc's revelation, Roy Mustang sprinted out the door, as if somebody's life depended on it. Roy didn't even bother taking anything with him. Not his uniform coat, not his hat, and not even his ignition gloves.

Roy ran with all he had, not caring if he was panting, that his hair was messed up, or even the fact that he was pretty much shoving people aside to get through the crowds. He even ran right in front of a moving car to cross the street. Roy's heart and breath seemed to pound with each breath and step that he leapt.

Da-thump. Roy's heart beat. _I have to get there!_ Boom. His foot met the pavement, and he used the momentum to push himself forward again.

Da-thump. Roy's heartbeat was in sync. _I can't let this happen._ leapt again. On and on he did so, until he finally reached the hospital, and bounded up the stairs, sprinting down the hall, and flinging the door open.

Everyone looked up, startled and surprised. Anyone close enough to have been invited to this would've known Riza had on purposely not told Roy. Now that Roy was here, he couldn't seem to get his mouth to open. Riza just sat there, watching him, waiting for him to say something. Her eyes were guarded, as if expecting something she didn't want to here.

Looking between Riza and Roy, Grumman suggested, "I think we ought to give them some privacy to think talk things over." Everyone smartly followed him out, one by one. Rebecca, the last one to walk out, glared at Roy, before giving Riza a look between sympathy and reassurance.

Once the door closed, Roy found his voice and growled, "What the hellare you doing?!"

Riza flinched. Never had Roy talked to her like that. Ever. Not since the day he met her when he was just a curious city boy staying in her house to study with her Father. Never had this anger been directed at her. She knew he meant every word and every bit of harshness he used this time.

"What does it look like I'm doing?"Riza asked, face still remaining cold, raising an eyebrow, even as waves of pain drowned her heart inside, and she had to fight off the urge to cry harder than ever.

Riza continued averting her face to look out the window, "It's not like you were happy about our son in the first place. Instead of creating a burden of me and a child you didn't want, this would solve all your problems."

"What?!"Roy answered, taken aback and confused. He racked his mind of something he had done to upset Riza so that she would play such a big prank on him like that. But then he saw the way she held their son, so protectively, and then his heart wrenched when he saw tears trailing down her cheeks. He had caused his own wife to cry, and he didn't even know why! Roy felt guilty. He was a horrible man. If he hadn't been so wrapped up in being scared, perhaps he would know why she was crying, and therefore know what to do about it.

"Roy, you're not a calm person. I know very well that if you were at least mostly happy about the child, you would be jumping with joy. You would've named him, you would've went to Maes' grave to blabber about him, just like Maes did to you. You would already have a list of things you would proudly teach our son. You wouldn't call our son it. You wouldn't have avoided touching me, and distanced yourself away from me these past nine months,"Riza answered pretty much at a whisper.

Roy stared at her, dumbfounded, finally piecing it all together. Riza had read right through him. She was willing to give it all up, the family she had envisioned because she thought Roy wasn't happy about the child, but the exact opposite was true.

Finally, Roy understood her guarded and pained expression. Roy took several steps forward, wrapping his arms around Riza, and pulling her into an embrace like he hadn't done in a really, really long while (while trying not to crush the child in Riza's arms). Riza simply leaned into his embrace and inhaled deeply.

"No... I-I-I'm a coward, Riza. I'm a bad man. I was too wrapped up in being scared, because I don't have a father myself to look out for you, or our son, and you almost had to make a decision that would've shattered you completely, the part of you that is left after everything you've experienced because of me,"Roy apologized, whispering it to her in her ear.

Roy turned to face her, so that he could look her in the eyes, and he could feel her sweet breath on his lips. "So don't sign those papers, Riza. I know how much you've wanted a family."

Riza didn't answer, and simply leaned in to kiss him. He tasted something salty, and finally realized, that both their faces were wet from tears. They only parted when the baby started wailing. This time, Roy helped rock the baby, although awkwardly and nervously, as Riza adjusted her clothing so that she could feed the child.

As Roy handed the child back to her, he delivered an answer long due. "Maes."

Riza turned to him, confused. "What?"

"Maes. Grumman said you wanted me to name him. Maes. Maes Mustang,"Roy replied with a grin.

Riza smiled back, and for the first time in a while, it was okay with just the three of them. Roy, Riza, and Maes Mustang.

 **As many of you may know (or not) this was originally a 1 shot. 1 chapter. This was changed. 2 reasons. 1st: Guest Reviewer Anon suggested it. 2nd: I was bored, and read a lot of Roy and Riza stories. So as you may have guessed, this 2nd chapter is written for Anon the guest reviewer.**


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